Anthony Jeselnik is a well-known comedian and writer who is famous for his dark humor and controversial one-liners. His stand-up routines and TV appearances have gained him a massive following, and his quotes are often shared and discussed on social media platforms. Jeselnik’s humor is not for everyone, but his fans appreciate his unique style of comedy.
Jeselnik’s quotes are often provocative and edgy, and he has been known to push boundaries with his humor. Some of his most famous quotes include “My girlfriend makes me want to be a better person—so I can get a better girlfriend,” and “I would never hit a woman – even if she had a knife or a shutter.” While some may find his humor offensive, others appreciate his willingness to tackle taboo subjects and challenge social norms.
Jeselnik’s quotes have become popular among fans of dark humor, and his influence on the comedy world cannot be denied. Whether you find his humor hilarious or offensive, there is no denying that Jeselnik’s quotes are thought-provoking and often controversial. In this article, we will explore some of Anthony Jeselnik’s most famous quotes and discuss why they have resonated with so many people.
Who is Anthony Jeselnik?
Anthony Jeselnik is an American comedian, writer, actor, and producer. He was born on December 22, 1978, in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Jeselnik is known for his dark comedy style, which emphasizes ironic misdirection, non sequiturs, biting insults, an arrogant demeanor, and a stage persona that frequently takes amoral or psychopathic stances.
Jeselnik started his career as a writer for Late Night with Jimmy Fallon and Comedy Central Roasts. He gained popularity as a stand-up comedian with his appearances on Comedy Central’s Roast series, where he roasted celebrities such as Donald Trump, Charlie Sheen, and Roseanne Barr.
Jeselnik’s stand-up comedy is often considered offensive and controversial due to his jokes about death, suicide, and other taboo subjects. However, he has stated in interviews that he does not believe in censorship and that his comedy is meant to be taken as a joke.
Jeselnik has released multiple comedy specials, including “Caligula” and “Thoughts and Prayers” on Netflix. He has also hosted his own television shows, including “The Jeselnik Offensive” and “Good Talk with Anthony Jeselnik.”
Overall, Anthony Jeselnik is a comedian known for his dark humor and controversial jokes. His unique style and willingness to push boundaries have made him a popular figure in the comedy world.
Anthony Jeselnik’s Comedy Style
Anthony Jeselnik is known for his dark comedy style, which often features ironic misdirection, non sequiturs, biting insults, an arrogant demeanor, and a stage persona that frequently takes amoral or psychopathic stances. His comedy style is not for the faint of heart and is often considered offensive by many.
Jeselnik’s jokes are often centered around taboo topics such as death, suicide, and tragedy. He has been known to make light of sensitive subjects, which has caused controversy and backlash from some audiences. However, his fans appreciate his ability to find humor in even the darkest of situations.
One of Jeselnik’s signature techniques is the use of misdirection, where he sets up an expectation for a punchline and then delivers a completely unexpected twist. He also uses repetition and call-backs throughout his sets, creating a cohesive and memorable performance.
Despite the controversy surrounding his material, Jeselnik’s comedic talent is undeniable. His jokes are cleverly crafted and delivered with impeccable timing, making audiences both cringe and laugh out loud. Here are some of his most famous quotes:
- “I’m not a good person, but I would do anything for my friends. Except for that. And that. Or that.”
- “I love being a comedian because if I’m ever feeling down, I can just go on stage and make fun of someone else’s life.”
- “I’m not a racist. I hate everyone equally.”
- “Sometimes when I’m driving, I get so angry at pedestrians I want to scream ‘Get out of my way!’ But then I remember, they have the right of way. And I’m driving on the sidewalk.”
- “I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.”
In conclusion, Anthony Jeselnik’s comedy style is unique and polarizing. While some may find his material offensive, others appreciate his ability to find humor in even the darkest of situations. His use of misdirection and repetition make his performances memorable and his jokes cleverly crafted.
Anthony Jeselnik’s Controversial Jokes
Anthony Jeselnik is known for his dark and offensive humor, often pushing the boundaries of what is considered acceptable in comedy. While some find his jokes hilarious, others find them distasteful and offensive. Here are some examples of his most controversial jokes:
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Death and Suicide: Jeselnik often jokes about death and suicide, which can be uncomfortable topics for many people. For example, he once said, “My girlfriend said to me the other day, ‘I’m going to go home and kill myself.’ And I said, ‘It better not be in this apartment.'”
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Abortion: Jeselnik has also made jokes about abortion, which can be a sensitive topic for many people. For example, he once said, “I’m pro-choice, but only because I think women should have to make the same decision to have an abortion that I have to make when I masturbate: alone, in the dark, and filled with shame.”
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Racism: Jeselnik has been criticized for making racist jokes, such as this one: “I love being a white guy, because whenever I’m in a bad mood, I can just be like, ‘Well, at least I’m not a black guy.'”
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Violence Against Women and Children: Jeselnik has also made jokes about violence against women and children, which can be triggering for some people. For example, he once said, “I accidentally hit a little kid with my car. It wasn’t serious — nobody saw me.”
Despite the controversy surrounding his jokes, Anthony Jeselnik has a large following of fans who appreciate his unique brand of humor. Here are some of his most memorable quotes:
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“I’m not a good person, but I would do anything for love. Except for that, obviously. That’s just gross.”
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“I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.”
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“If at first you don’t succeed, failure may be your style.”
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“I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals. I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants.”
Love him or hate him, Anthony Jeselnik’s jokes are sure to elicit a strong reaction from his audience.
Anthony Jeselnik’s Personal Life
Anthony Jeselnik was born on December 22, 1978, in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. He was raised in a Catholic family, and his father was a physician. Jeselnik’s mother, on the other hand, worked as a secretary in a school. He has a younger brother, who is an attorney.
In terms of relationships, Jeselnik has been quite private. He has not revealed much information about his dating life, but he has mentioned in interviews that he has had a few serious relationships in the past. In one of his jokes, he said, “My girlfriend makes me want to be a better person—so I can get a better girlfriend.”
Jeselnik has also talked about his family in his stand-up routines. He has joked about his father being a doctor and how he would use that to his advantage when he was a child. He has also mentioned that he has a long history of suicide in his family, but the good news is that it skips a generation, so if he’s lucky, his kids will kill themselves.
In terms of his mother, Jeselnik has not talked about her as much in his comedy. However, in an interview, he mentioned that his mother was supportive of his career choice and would often come to his shows.
Finally, Jeselnik has also talked about his ex-girlfriend in his stand-up routines. He has joked about spending the past two years looking for her killer, but no one will do it. He has also mentioned that he wants to thank his ex-girlfriend for breaking up with him because it led to him becoming a comedian.
Anthony Jeselnik’s Career
Anthony Jeselnik is a well-known comedian who has been in the industry for over a decade. He is known for his dark humor and his ability to make audiences laugh while pushing the boundaries of what is considered acceptable. In this section, we’ll take a closer look at Jeselnik’s career and the various milestones he has achieved.
Jeselnik began his career as a writer for the Jimmy Kimmel Live! show. He then went on to write for other TV shows, including Late Night with Jimmy Fallon and the Comedy Central Roasts. Jeselnik’s writing skills were quickly recognized, and he was soon offered the opportunity to perform stand-up comedy.
Jeselnik’s stand-up career took off quickly, and he soon became known for his edgy material and his ability to make audiences laugh at taboo subjects. He released his first comedy album, Shakespeare, in 2010, which was well-received by audiences and critics alike. He followed up with another album, Caligula, in 2013, which won him the award for Best Comedy Album at the Just for Laughs Awards.
In addition to his stand-up career, Jeselnik has also had success with his own TV show. The Jeselnik Offensive premiered on Comedy Central in 2013 and ran for two seasons. The show was a mix of stand-up comedy, sketches, and interviews, and Jeselnik’s unique sense of humor was on full display.
Overall, Jeselnik’s career has been marked by his willingness to take risks and push boundaries. He has won over audiences with his dark humor and his ability to make them laugh at subjects that are often considered taboo. With his writing skills, stand-up career, and TV show, Jeselnik has established himself as one of the most talented comedians of his generation.
Anthony Jeselnik’s Influences
Anthony Jeselnik is a comedian known for his dark humor and controversial jokes. He has cited several comedians as his influences, including Mitch Hedberg, Stephen Wright, and other geniuses in the comedy world.
Mitch Hedberg was a comedian who had a big impact on Jeselnik’s early career. Jeselnik has said that he went through a “Mitch Hedberg phase” where he tried to emulate Hedberg’s style of delivery and one-liners. However, Jeselnik eventually found his own voice and style, which is more focused on shock value and taboo subjects.
Stephen Wright is another comedian who has influenced Jeselnik. Wright’s deadpan delivery and surreal humor can be seen in Jeselnik’s own performances. Jeselnik has also mentioned other comedy legends, such as George Carlin and Richard Pryor, as inspirations for his work.
Jeselnik’s comedy is often criticized for being offensive and insensitive, but he has defended his style by saying that he is just trying to make people laugh. He has also said that he enjoys pushing boundaries and challenging people’s expectations.
In conclusion, Anthony Jeselnik’s influences include Mitch Hedberg, Stephen Wright, and other comedy legends. While he may be controversial, Jeselnik is a talented comedian who has found success by pushing boundaries and challenging his audience.
Anthony Jeselnik’s Funniest Quotes
Anthony Jeselnik is a master of dark humor and his jokes are not for the faint of heart. He has a unique ability to make audiences laugh at taboo subjects, making him one of the most controversial comedians of our time. Here are some of his funniest quotes that are sure to make you laugh out loud.
- “I’m not a religious person, but if you’re up there, save me, Superman!” – Anthony Jeselnik
- “I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.” – Anthony Jeselnik
- “I love being a comedian because I’m allowed to say what everyone’s thinking, but no one else has the balls to say.” – Anthony Jeselnik
- “My girlfriend said she wanted me to be more like her ex. So I dumped her.” – Anthony Jeselnik
- “I’m not a good role model. I’m not a good role model for myself, let alone anyone else.” – Anthony Jeselnik
- “I’m not a fan of the police, but I’m a big fan of police dogs. They’re the only cops who can say, ‘I love you’ without it being weird.” – Anthony Jeselnik
- “I’m not a racist. I hate everyone equally.” – Anthony Jeselnik
- “I’m a vegetarian not because I love animals, it’s because I hate plants.” – Anthony Jeselnik
Anthony Jeselnik’s jokes are not for everyone, but if you have a twisted sense of humor, his quotes are sure to make you laugh. Whether you love him or hate him, it’s hard to deny that he’s one of the funniest comedians of our time. So, sit back, relax, and enjoy the laughter.
Conclusion
Anthony Jeselnik is a comedian known for his dark humor and edgy one-liners. His quotes are often controversial, but they also provide a unique perspective on life and society.
Through his jokes, Jeselnik challenges societal norms and encourages people to think critically about the world around them. He often touches on taboo topics such as death, religion, and sexuality, which can be uncomfortable for some people. However, his humor is not meant to offend but to provoke thought and conversation.
Jeselnik’s quotes are not for everyone, but for those who appreciate his style of comedy, they can be both hilarious and thought-provoking. He has a unique ability to find humor in even the darkest of situations, which is a skill that not many comedians possess.
Overall, Anthony Jeselnik’s quotes are a reflection of his unique perspective on life and society. They may not be for everyone, but for those who appreciate his style of humor, they can be both entertaining and enlightening.